[Finished] Testing the waters

[Saaga Sun]

Keeping a safe distance and ignoring difficult issues by keeping oneself occupied with work and trivial matters was a form of art Saaga had pretty much perfected over the years. Whenever she found herself thinking about the estranged wife under whose shadow she walked, she’d quickly find something to do to distance herself from the problem, be it helping Fey with her sewing work, or cleaning the apartment or book keeping at the emporium even if the latter was something she found little pleasure in. She often reasoned to herself that if she did not think about it too much, it wasn’t really her problem but no matter how much she tried to ignore it her thoughts wandered to that direction anyway.

She’d met up with Narye a few times after that horrid incident at the bar he frequented, for a cup of tea and a quick chat before she had to get back to work. On one occasion she had gone so far as to ask for his phone number, but she’d never actually called him. It was a weird feeling, enjoying his company and then feeling guilty afterwards because she was unintentionally stepping on some woman’s toes, even if the woman in question was not in the picture to care if she did or not.

“Aren’t you being a little cruel?” Shou had said to her as they were working to finish a batch of wine glasses one afternoon, just the two of them. Tseng and master Zhang had gone to fetch new materials and had left the shop in their care.

“How do you mean?” Saaga had asked him a little confused. Shou was close to her age and having heard about her mystery suitor from Tseng, had decided to become her confidant on relationships whether she wanted him to or not. As such he would always pester her for details whenever she’d gone on one of her tea excursions with Narye.

“I mean, that aren’t you just baiting him? You hang out for a half hour at some tea place or something and just talk. If I was him, I’d be flipping out,” he’d answered pausing only to blow some air into the pipe and to spin it, while Saaga evaluated his work.

“I’m not baiting him! I think…What? You think he’s concerned I’m not serious?” she asked, a little shy and alarmed at the same time. It was not like she had a lot of firsthand experience on these things.

“Darling…All I’m saying is, I take my niece out to tea and biscuits once in a while. A stuffy tea house with old grandmas and satin cushions is not exactly a place for romance. It’s a place for gossip and knitting, or in your case sitting and fidgeting.”

She had not thought about it that way, but somehow Shou’s words had made a lot of sense. It did take two people to form a relationship and so far she’d been so wrapped up in her own thoughts, she’d completely disregarded that the whole thing must’ve been difficult for Narye as well. After all, the matter was about his wife.

“I’m allowed to be selfish right? I don’t owe that woman anything. It’s her loss isn’t it?”

So she had gathered up the courage to call Narye and ask him out for dinner, first hoping that he would not pick up and then when he did, feeling flustered through out the conversation.

And now she was waiting for him at the restaurant sitting at a table for two, hair fixed and wearing a dress. She felt a little embarrassed, being used to wearing trousers and shirts and jackets which tended to cover her up but at the same time she had wanted to take the opportunity to look pretty for him even if it felt a bit out of her element.

[Narye Matsuya]

Narye wasn't doing quite as well--or, perhaps, just as well-- when it came to their relationship outside of their meetings at the tea house or whatever other little venue they frequented. Despite being a school teacher with plenty to distract him, such as student issues and grading papers, Narye's thoughts kept drifting back to how he much he was trying to invest in their relationship. Maybe it wasn't too much of a problem when he was up front and giving a lesson, but when he was home alone with the tests and classwork, those thoughts just creeped up on him.

After the, uh, "incident" at the bar, Narye and Saaga had at least made it mostly clear that they both wanted to take a chance and see if something meaningful came of them being together. Narye was happy to hear that, and he was definitely doing his best while also trying to respect the unspoken boundaries that had been established. He thoroughly enjoyed the time they spent at the tea shop, talking and getting to know each other better. But that seemed to be the extent of what Saaga wanted to do, at least as long as Narye was giving Saaga her space.

It was... a little disheartening, especially since she had asked for his phone number but never used it. He wasn't "flipping out" but he was frustrated, in more ways than one. Call him clingy but Narye wanted more time with her, and it was starting to feel like she didn't want any more with him. In a funny kind of way, it seemed in line with how their relationship worked. He'd be doubtful and she'd be... reserved, but then there were short bursts of real connection between them, then it would repeat.

Of course that was all ignoring the big Goat Gorilla in the room(Even bigger than the fact that she was nearly half his age): the wife and child that were no longer there. It wasn't something they talked about, but they both knew it was there. Narye tried to keep the conversation on him and Saaga, wordlessly assuring her that Saaga was the only woman on his mind, which was a truth. Whether or not that got across was an unknown.

So considering all of that, Narye was pleased and excited when the phone rang and it turned out that Saaga was on the other end. He knew he sounded elated, which might have explained why Saaga sounded so adorably nervous on her end. Her inexperience in relationships, an area that Narye was well-knowledged in, was endearing to him. He accepted her invitation to dinner without hesitation.

Now Narye stood outside the restaurant, dressed as nice as he was the first night they met sans mask. It had been awhile since he had been on something that could be called an official date, and he hadn't realized that all of his nice outfits looked kind of the same. A less observant person would just say that he was wearing a differently colored vest than the one he wore at the Ball.

One last deep breath to prepare himself and he was stepping into the fine establishment. After telling the host that he was here to meet with someone, he was lead over to where Saaga was seated, looking beautiful all dressed-up for the occasion.

He took a moment to take the sight of her in, smiling, before taking the seat across from her.

"You're lookin' gorgeous tonight, Saaga."

[Saaga Sun]

While she was waiting for Narye to show up, Saaga found herself feeling uncharacteristically nervous. It was the first time she’d ever asked a man out to dine with her, in a romantic sense or otherwise and somehow it felt like time was crawling forward at a snail’s pace. She glanced at the entrance way a few times, fiddled with the hem of her dress to keep her hands from murdering the folded linen napkin and checked that her make up had not flaked from the tacky dragon wall mirror that hung right next to the table. It served as a candle holder as well, and as she looked around to other tables she noticed similar mirrors with varying designs, all equally unappealing to look at.

“Calm down. It’s not like you’re seeing him for the first time. What’s there to be nervous about?” she thought and took a deep breath, fanning her face with a gloved hand.

And then she saw him being shown in to the dining hall and to her table. She immediately hid her hands on her lap, not wanting to seem like she was feeling uncomfortable and certainly not wanting to give away the fact the she was feeling a little giddy just seeing him walk in.

Poised and aloof, that was the essence of a proper lady, her mother had often said and for once she actually found herself wanting to abide by her teachings, though she had not really shown any sort of feminine qualities to the man before. She was rude, talked straight and drank like a sailor if and when she drank, so trying to appear like a lady might’ve seemed a little pointless. But since she had gone to the trouble of looking pretty, might as well act pretty too.

She returned his smile, thinking he looked very handsome. Just like the night they had first met. She didn’t find it in her to actually compliment him out loud, something which he didn’t seem to have a problem with at all.

“Thank you,” she replied curtly and let the server come over to bring them their menus. She thanked the liveried man and then when he was gone returned her attention to Narye.

Somehow she found it surprisingly hard to start a conversation. Talking about work and such was the kind of idle small talk she hated, but what else could she use as an icebreaker?

“I’ve never actually been to this place before, but Tseng recommended it. I hope their cooking is better than their sense for décor,” she said smiling and gestured towards the mirror on the wall, hanging there in its gilded dragon headed glory and candlesticks sticking out from each side.

[Narye Matsuya]

To Narye, the young woman across from him didn't look too out of her element, at least in terms of dress. The last time he had seen her dressed-up was at the Masquerade Ball, but this occasion was more formal and required the full get-up. It was a far cry from how he normally saw her, usually in trousers and work clothes with her hair cutely mussed. He had to admit though, she cleaned-up very well. The dress was beautiful and refined and hugged her body nicely, and the gloves were a classy touch he had honestly never seen before. Narye felt an urge to comb his fingers through her smoothed hair.

However, it would seem that the nerves were a little contagious at their table. Saaga was doing an excellent job leveraging her upbringing to hide her nervousness, but Narye was a little less fortunate. Underneath the table and out of sight, his foot was bouncing up and down quietly. Hopefully it wouldn't cause his knee to come up and knock the bottom of the table.

Narye hadn't been on a date like this since... forever. There had been romantic dinners when he was married, but those weren't "dates" so much as times to get out of the house for alone time. Before then, dates weren't nearly as formal since they were basically set-ups to get into a girl's skirt. But as unfamiliar as it was, Narye kept telling himself it was just like any other time he hung out with Saaga, only there were more overt romantic implications going on.

At least talking and conversation were things he could easily do, even in this situation. In the small silence, Narye could tell that maybe he would need to speak up and break some of the tension. But it was Saaga whom made the first move.

"Yeah, I've never been in here either. Seen it from the outside, but I never found a reason to come in until now."

Looking around at all the wall fixtures and decorations, Narye couldn't help but feel a little out place. Fancy things were never his strong suit, and he honestly couldn't tell if there was anything particular wrong with the look of the place.

"Really? I don't think I'd mind having one of these in the house. It looks neat. Too guady maybe? I think you got better taste in looks than me so I'll defer to you. I mean, just look at you."

Once again, Narye just had t compliment her on her appearance, gesturing up and down from her dress to her hair. He just really liked how pretty she looked.

[Saaga Sun]

Saaga feigned an expression of horror at Narye’s comment about the mirror looking ‘neat’, which to be honest was not completely faked. The thought of ever seeing such a tacky thing attached to the wall of an apartment she might frequent often was very discomforting. She had not thought her aesthetic senses were particularly better when compared to others, but in Narye’s case she was willing to agree that she had better taste, at least when it came to wall fixtures.

“I’d mind, you having one of those in the house,” she said laughing and hid her face behind the menu for a little while. She could feel her cheeks blushing, an all too predictable side effect of realizing the implications behind her words. She was really not in a position to be dictating what kind of horrible misshapen abominations he should be purchasing to ‘decorate’ his home.

Besides, her being too forward and blunt went against the whole concept of being a proper lady and her natural brashness clashed magnificently with her otherwise polished outward appearance.

A lady must never say anything that might make her partner feel foolish or uncomfortable. If she did not know what to say, a simple nod and a smile would suffice. Saaga remembered all too well all the things her mother had desperately tried to teach her. She could almost hear her nagging voice in her head and grimaced at the thought. With a quiet sigh, she placed the menu back on the table, still browsing through the pages.

“I’m really not cut out to be the perfect debutant kind of woman who nods and smiles at everything. I’m way too honest,” she said, smiling and leaned her cheek against her hand.

She studied the menu for a moment to take the chance to think of what else she might say, dismissing the meat dishes outright and going straight for the vegetarian cuisine. She was not a vegetarian herself, but she really wasn’t in the mood for anything greasy and heavy. Perhaps for fish, but definitely not for any kind of beef.

She thought about how her mother had often gone to their neighbor’s house to ask for advice on how to get through to her daughter. After all, their Miel was the perfect little lady, quiet and adaptive and eager to please. She was still like that and the only of them girls who’d had a steady relationship for more than a year. Well, she was only really competing with Aya, everyone else was either too busy working, being too young or being uninterested. But thinking about it made her curious.

“Narye, since you’re a man I guess you can tell me if guys really do find simpering shrinking violets attractive? I’ve always wondered about that,” she asked with an interested tone and turned her gaze away from the menu to look at him.

[Narye Matsuya]

It was a good thing Saaga hid herself behind her menu after Narye apparently made it clear that he had less-than-good taste in home decorations. A moment had to pass for it to click in his head, but her words finally did reach their mark and he picked-up on the implication she made, chuckling quietly and finding his mind wondering what exactly that situation would be like. It seemed like an interesting situation.

"Don't worry too much about it. I ain't expecting you to be a--What'd you call it?--a debutant. Hell, look at me."

Narye may have dressed-up and cleaned-up for the occasion, and even tried to do a bit etiquette review back home, but he was still the same man. Like Saaga, the fancy, well-groomed life of high society person wasn't his strong suit. He was still a farm boy at heart, and that meant imprecise speech patterns and not exactly knowing what constituted "proper" behavior sometimes.

"Wait. Hold a second. Do you have to not be honest to be a debutant? That doesn't sounds right.."

That kind of thinking made Narye almost appreciate his lowbrow-ness. He was sure that most high society types were generally good people, but not what kind of etiquette barred being honest? Maybe he was reading it wrong. Lying was okay sometimes, usually to spare someone's feelings. It was a strange custom though... He had would to think or talk about it some more. After he answerer Saaga's rather blunt question.

At least she was sticking to what she was. Her questions was a bit of a tough one though. Narye scratched his head a little and took a moment to try and formulate an answer.

"Umm... Some men find that attractive, for various reasons. I suppose it depends on the man and the woman. I know that some men like wilder women. I know I fancied both party girls and quieter ones too, depending on how they looked..."

He realized he might be saying more than he should and stopped himself.

"If you're asking whether or not I like you like this, well, you look nice and elegant. But I still prefer you the way you usually are."

[Saaga Sun]

All the time she’d spent with Narye, however little time that may be, Saaga had noticed that the man had a habit of belittling himself and it seemed that he was doing it again just then. The way he gestured to himself, putting himself down for the sake of making her feel better about herself apparently, was something she wanted to root out of him. She had to wonder if it was an unconscious thing, or if she was just reading him wrong in this. Both options appeared plausible enough for her, but she wasn’t going to start picking his brain about it during what was supposed to be a romantic dinner. It was hard enough to achieve a romantic mood with her as the dinner companion.

“I suppose I could have worded it a bit differently. What I meant is that, where I come from it was customary to root out any kind of distinguishable personality from a woman. You existed only to get married and to have children, to raise them and to die. So it’s more like you couldn’t be honest with yourself and what you wanted. You just had to be compliant in everything. I could never do that and I’m glad I don’t have to,” she explained and traced the letters of a particularly long name on the menu with her fingers. Her tone was a little flat, but she was smiling as she spoke.

In truth, Saaga had not much to complain about on that front. Unlike many of her childhood friends she’d never had any suitors, mostly because her father and grandpa had ruined her as her mother would put it and also because her disability gave many a young man the creeps. They feared it was hereditary and that significantly lowered her value as a wife candidate. She wanted to kiss her thumb everytime she thought of it.

She dismissed those thoughts and focused on Narye as he was answering her question. She had a hard time keeping a straight face, especially when he distinctly avoided getting any deeper into his personal relationship history. It was not like Saaga particularly wanted to know all the details, but she found it a little funny still. The man was nineteen years older than her after all; she knew perfectly well that he was no stranger to female company. But it was nice of him to try and spare her feelings, even if it was a little pointless.

“I always liked boys who could climb trees very well and who’d swim and play with me. My mother put a stop to that the moment I got breasts,” she said with a little grin and reminisced how they’d used to jump from the cliffs into the ocean and how they got yelled at by their parents afterwards. It had been such fun.

“Oh you do? Good to know. I can stop putting in effort,” she started with a joking tone and then gestured to the menu: “You think we should order soon?”

[Narye Matsuya]

Narye nodded along with Saaga's clarification of what she had said about being a proper woman. It was... Interesting. To Narye at least. Given the vastness of the world and the variety of people that inhabited it, the kind of practice she was describing could easily have been a semi-common one. The only instance that he could recall of coming into contact with something like that was with Yumi, whom was raised in a similar manner.

As much as he didn't agree with that particular brand of women's etiquette, Narye couldn't just dismiss it as something unncessary or stupid. It wasn't in his nature to do that. At best, he could learn it, understand it, and analyze it. The custom seemed outdated anyway and Saaga was nothing like that, so he probably never have to deal with it.

"I'm glad you're not that way either."

His cheeks flushed slightly when she seemed to find his dodging of the past relationship issue amusing, not quite knowing what about it she found funny. Sidestepping what other women he had been with, other than the most obvious one, was something he had been doing for awhile. But this was the first time he had to stop himself. All the other times he managed to not bring it up at all. Doing that seemed like general politeness, and it was all so long ago anyway. Narye's teenage playboy days were long behind him.

Narye couldn't help but grin at Saaga's decription of her favorite type of boy, even if it was from way back in her childhood.

"Kind of sounds like me when I was young. Except I think I was a bit more reckless and stupid. But that's what happens when you got a bunch of rowdy friends too."

Saaga got a stifled chuckle out of Narye when she mentioned not putting in more effort. He held back saying that he'd still like her even after that because she probably knew that already. Plus, Saaga was hardly the lazy type.

"I guess we can go ahead and put in our orders. Lets see how well this place cooks."

The next chance that they got, when their server came back around to check on them, Narye went and put in an order for some kind of chicken dish. He didn't know what it was but it sounded pretty good and he might as well have tried it. The server took their orders and their menus and headed off to put them into the kitchen. Afterward Narye got comfortable enough to pose a bit of a sensitive question.

"So, Saaga, I don't think I've asked you this before, but... Am I, like, the first man you've had a relationship with? 'Cause you seem kind of antsy sometimes."

[Saaga Sun]

”I have no doubts about that. You haven’t lost all your rowdiness,” she agreed with a little smirk, thinking it was kind of reckless to pick up a strange girl from a party and then show up at her work expecting things to work out. But since things really had worked out in Narye’s favor, she supposed it wasn’t all that bad an idea to take chances every once in a while.

“I was all over the place as a child. I’d run around robbing birds’ nests and doing all sorts of other things I wasn’t supposed to be doing. Nothing much has really changed, on that account at least,” Saaga told him, thinking they had a lot of in common in a way, having both been good hearted kids deep down, despite being hard to reign in. Most of that reigning in had befallen on her mother, her father adopting a ‘let kids be kids’ kind of attitude. Thinking about it now she really felt sorry for her mother, for her father most certainly had not been the easiest person to live with. She loved them both dearly, but now that she’d reached adulthood and faced many difficulties, she had to wonder how her mother had managed not to strangle her father for all those years.

The server came round then and she used the time it took for Narye to make his order, to make a quick last minute look through the menu. She settled on a light vegetable dish and water spiced with jasmine and peach for drink.

She settled her hands on her lap and pulled at her gloves nervously, the little silence left by the waiter gnawing at her confidence. She was feeling a little too conscious about the situation and herself, fiercely wondering what she might say to spark another conversation. When Narye asked his question she first gave him a look of relief, until the essence of the question hit home.

At first she didn’t say anything, just felt the blood thrumming in her head and rushing to her cheeks. She didn’t really know why it embarrassed her so to hear him ask such a question. It was a perfectly valid inquiry and she’d asked him sensitive questions as well, with very little subtlety.

“Yes, you are. Is that a bad thing?” she said finally, bringing her hand up to touch her cheek in an effort to cool down a little. She felt kind of ‘antsy’ right now as well like she did whenever she walked on unfamiliar ground. It made her feel less confident not knowing how things worked and she disliked feeling that way, choosing to put on a cool exterior to save some face.

[Narye Matsuya]

Doing things you weren't supposed to be doing. That should be the mantra of children and young people everywhere. Unlike Saaga, Narye's father had to raise him by himself after the mother left only a few years after Narye's birth. So the man had to be both the affectionate parent and the firm parent all in one. Sometimes he was Narye's best friend and confidant, other times he had to put his foot down and put the boy in his place lest he get too out of hand, and that was just when Narye was a child.

His teenage years must have taken a few years off of his father's life with all the trouble he caused. Since he was no longer a child, he got into teenage trouble instead. He wasn't a hooligan, the kind that broke stuff and stole. Narye was still a good kid raised by an earnest father. But all the trouble came in the form of angry fathers chasing Narye away from their daughters or Narye needing some kind of help after getting himself into a particularly hairy situation after he and his friends did something particularly stupid.

But Narye had matured and grown up and all that, especially after getting married and having a child. There were hints of wildness still in him, and that's what Saaga was seeing before her now.

"Of course it isn't a bad thing. I find it cute and endearing sometimes."

Her answer and reaction were the expected kind, and Narye gave her a reassuring smile to ward off the embarrassment and nerves. She was a mature young woman in a lot respects, but there were times that Narye could see her inexperience peeking through. Narye had, uh, suspected her inexperience since the night they spent together after the Ball. Turns out it was true. That was her first time and Narye was experienced enough to spot it. In a way, it was their age difference manifesting itself.

"I just needed to confirm a guess I made. But again, I don't think less of you for it. I suppose it means I can show you a thing or two..."

He shot her a mischievious grin before laughing it off.

[color=navy}"I kid. It means you shouldn't feel bad nervous about tellin' me if you, say, don't know what to do in a certian situation. Romance is a complicated venture. Sometimes a guide is helpful."[/color]